Quick update...or maybe not so quick after all...

I am so not in the mood for blogging lately.  So this is going to be a quick update.

Thanksgiving was good.  Spent good quality time with family, both mine and the in-laws.  Emmett loved riding around in Pawpaw's golf cart.  He also loved riding in the trailer behind Grandpa's riding mower with his cousins, Philip and Gabe.  Those would be considered the highlights of his Thanksgiving I'm sure.  As usual, it went by too fast.

Emmett's 2nd birthday was this past Wednesday.  I will describe it in detail and include pictures soon.  He got to open his birthday presents from the extended family early during Thanksgiving visits.  He opened the ones from us on his actual birthday.  He got a track with a couple of battery powered trucks that drive around it.  The track has a bridge and can be rearranged in a million different ways.  He loves it.  We also got him a little electronic keyboard/piano and a wooden handcrafted helicopter.  This weekend we are planning to go and get him a couple of goldfish to complete his birthday presents.  We also took him for his first haircut.  He was absolutely terrified at first, but then he got over it and did very well the rest of the time.  He looks so handsome and grown up.  Pictures soon.  After his nap we took him to the mall and let him ride the train and play on the mall playground.  Then we went to Arby's and had a roast beef sandwich for dinner.  Emmett loves an Arby's roast beef sandwich with a crazy passion.  He doesn't care for chicken nuggets or hotdogs or burgers or any of the foods typical kids his age like.  He even ate his apple slices and yogurt pretty well.  His other favorite food is pizza.  At least that's more like a typical kid.

The other highlight of his birthday is that I finally found him new sneakers.  He needed a new pair in the worst way, and I have had the worst time trying to find him shoes that I like and he likes.  I wanted stride rites, but it seems that whenever we go in there, they are out of his size (8 wide) in every decent looking shoe.  I finally gave up waiting on any of the styles I liked, especially since his poor little toes were crammed up to the very tip top of his shoes.  She brought out anything they had in his size, and we finally settled on a pair that we all liked.  That was a big relief for me.

This weekend we will probably get a Christmas tree and start decorating.  Call me a grinch, but I don't really enjoy decorating for Christmas.  Its just another chore for me.  The only thing worse is taking it down after Christmas.  I never even got out my Halloween decorations this year because I just didn't feel like it.  But Christmas, you just can't skip that.  What I do look forward to is watching Emmett open his presents this year.  He did great with his birthday presents, and he gets it now.  The next morning after his birthday when I went in to get him out of his crib, the first thing he said to me was "Presents?"  Poor kid.  "No, sorry kiddo, not to today" I told him.  But lucky for him there will be presents again in just a few weeks.  He is starting to understand the concept of Santa too, so that should be fun.  Oh, we need to get out Elf on a Shelf and get started with that.  Ok, I am starting to get in the Christmas spirit.

Everytime I say I don't feel like blogging, I start typing and suddenly I've gone on and on.  But I'm really done now.  I will be posting pictures soon.  

What goes around comes around

In this case I'm talking about a cold.  Chris had it first, then Emmett caught it.  I thought I was in the clear when my throat started to hurt.  And even Nana and Great Grandma caught it when they came to watch him for me last Friday.  So far mine isn't too bad.  Emmett's was awful, for about 3 days he couldn't breath through his nose at all and his nose ran like a faucet.  And all the wiping caused his poor little nose to get sore along with his cheeks where he kept wiping the snot across his face during the night.  He didn't sleep well for a few nights.  He's getting better now, he can breath again but he's coughing some.  So far I just have a slight runny nose and a sore throat.  Only one side of my nose has been partially blocked, so I consider that a victory.  Having a stuffy nose is about the worst thing I can imagine.  It makes me contemplate whether or not life is worth living.  Of course that's an exageration, but only slightly.  However, adding the experience of giving birth to your list of life experiences sure puts things into perspective.  I would much rather have a stuffy nose than go through labor again.  Labor was about the worst thing I've ever gone through in my entire life, but with the absolute best result.  Its a good thing that becoming a mother is such a wonderful experience emotionally, otherwise no one would ever go through with it more than once.  But we are all on the mend and hopefully we will all be back to normal soon.

I'm excited about the holidays coming up.  I love Thanksgiving and Christmas.  I love getting together with family most of all, and the food is a close second.  Its funny how when you're a kid, all you can think about is presents.  I really don't care about that anymore.  People ask me what I want for Christmas and I usually have to think really hard to find anything.  Its a little easier now that we've been going without a bit more.  When you're on a tight household budget and you can't just buy yourself whatever you want whenever you want it, you tend to keep a little list of things in the back of your mind that you would like to have.  But sometimes you get so used to not indulging that you can't even get in the mindset of thinking about wants.  And once you're a parent, you don't think about yourself the same way anymore.  You think more about your child and what they need and want.  I am excited about Emmett's birthday the end of the month and about his Christmas this year since he should be in prime age to rip and tear into gifts.  Unfortunately he does have a terrible birthday, just a month before Christmas.  I guess it could be closer to Christmas which would be worse, but I just wish it was better spaced out.  I always thought my birthday in July was a good time of year for it, except for the fact that I never got to celebrate my birthday at school.  I guess I should be more glad that I never had to go to school on my birthday.  When Emmett is in school, if his birthday falls on a school day, I am definitely pulling him out to do something fun.  He can take his cupcakes to school the day after.

Speaking of birthdays, of course I have to comment on the fact that my baby boy will be two years old, and really really not a baby anymore this year.  The time feels like it has flown by.  My life never used to move so fast until Emmett was born.  Now its like I'm struggling to catch up, yelling "Wait!!" as the pages of the calendar flip by and I'm powerless to stop it.  Every time I catch myself getting frustrated with Emmett for any reason, wishing that he would get over a certain difficult phase, I try to stop and take a step back.  When he throws himself on the floor and throws a massive fit because he wants another snack when its only half an hour until dinner time, I just try to remember that sooner than later, he will be too big to cry over such little things.  And eventually he won't blow me kisses anymore, or kiss me on the knee (he's so random).  Even the worst nights of his cold, when he would wake up crying because he couldn't breathe and I had to rock him until he fell back asleep, I reminded myself that rocking him to sleep will only be possible for a little while.  Life will only be this way for a little while, and I'm thankful for every moment.

Trick or Treat!

Halloween was fun this year.  Emmett chose his own costume this year, Wilson from Chuggington.  Chuggington has become one of his favorite shows because it feeds his obssession with trains.  When we held up the costume in front of him in the store he smiled really big and held out his arms for it.  Surprisingly he even wanted to wear the hat that went with it.  He modeled it for the first time at Nana and Pawpaw's house this weekend.  Here he is:



It took him a little while to understand the concept of trick or treating, but once he did, we couldn't get him to stop.  He even tried to go back to houses we had already visited, and I kept telling him that was bad form.  We tried to get him to say "trick or treat" but the all he would say was "treat."  And he managed to say his version of thank you at a few houses, which really sounds like "gagoo."  It was chilly, so we only stayed out maybe an hour before we finally managed to convince him to go inside.  He followed a group of kids up to our house and took candy right from the bowl that Daddy held out, and I swear, he had no idea it was our house.  He was like a trick or treating machine.  We ended up running out of candy around 8:00 so we shut off our porch light.  And Emmett usually takes his bath around 8:30 anyway.  As we were about to put him to bed, one last group was ringing the doorbell and pounding on the door.  Eventually they went away, and that was the last of them.

Oh, a funny little story about Emmett and Halloween...Pawpaw kept saying to him "trick or treat, smell my feet" and Emmett would actually walk over and smell his feet.  It was hilarious, and of course the more we laughed, the more he did it.  Silly kid.

And another story about Emmett, this one not at all related to Halloween...Emmett now recognizes people by the vehicle they drive.  He sees a white mercedes SUV and he says "Pawpaw?" because that is the exact vehicle Chris's dad drives.  After last weekend when my parents were here we were outside and a blue Nissan Altima drove by.  Emmett says "Grandpa?"  And we were at the mall last week and he saw a silver Toyota Tacoma and he says "Daddy truck!" which is just what Chris drives.  I'm rather impressed with that.  He loves vehicles of all kinds, I just can't believe he can distinguish between actual makes and models of them.  What a cool kid!  I just love him!

circle of life

I had to cut my last post short because it was interrupted by a phone call.  As soon as I saw it was my dad, I knew exactly what the call was going to be about.  My Grandma passed away on Friday September 30th.  We knew her days were numbered.  She had recurring brain cancer that was incurrable and had been living in the hospice house for a few months.  She was first diagnosed with brain cancer a few years ago and had the tumors removed.  She then went through radiation treatment and one round of chemo.  The chemo affected her badly and she chose not to continue the treatment.  The doctors told her that without chemo the cancer would almost certainly return, it was just a matter of when.  She decided that if that happened, it was just her time and she was ready to go.  Her mental state declined gradually after that.  She went from requiring a daily visit from a nurse, to requiring an all day nurse, to a live-in nurse.  After that she was moved to assisted living, then a nursing home, then hospice house.  The morning she passed away she had a seizure and never regained conciousness. 

Most of my extended family (grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins) live in Pennsylvania.  When I was little we lived not even two hours away and I saw my grandparents often.  When I was 11 we moved to Virginia and our visits became less frequent.  Once I moved to North Carolina after college we didn't even go up once a year.  After having Emmett it became even harder to travel the distance.  We finally took him to PA for a visit last April.  He was not quite 18 months old then, but it was the first time my Grandma ever saw him, and also the last.  The visit was awkward, Emmett not being comfortable with someone he's never seen before in the strange setting of the assisted living center.  It was difficult for me too, to see my Grandma in the condition she was in.  I don't even like to remember her that way, I remember her the way she was when I was young.  I feel bad that we didn't see her more often, but unfortunately I can't go back in time and change it. 

My Grandma was a wonderful lady.  I can only hope to be half the person she was.  She had 5 children.  My dad was her 4th.  There are 12 grandchildren of which I am number 7.  And so far 9 great-grandchildren.  The most amazing part is that we were all together, for the first time in years, for Grandma's funeral.  Grandma was always trying to make us be the best we could be.  She wrote me letters regularly in college so that I would always have mail.  Even after we moved to VA she and Grandpa came to the important events in my life.  They were there for my high school graduation, in fact that is the last picture I have of my Grandparents before my Grandpa passed away the summer after my freshman year of college.  They came to my all-district choir concert my junior year in high school.  I still have the bear my Grandma gave me after the performance.  I have a lot more wonderful memories that will always be dear to my heart.

Ever since I heard the news I have had a peaceful heart.  I know that it was her time and she was ready to go.  I also know she and Grandpa are together again, in heaven, and I can only hope to live my life as such that I will see them again there one day.

One the way to PA for her funeral I got news that a friend of mine had her baby.  The circle of life really is an amazing thing.

Like sand through the hour glass...

Since my last post things have gone back to normal.  Emmett has part of 3 of his molars showing, but one still hasn't come through.  So I'm sure we're not out of the woods yet, but for right now things are fine.  He's sleeping great again and eating well.  Still not a fan of vegetables, but we're working on that. 

His vocabulary is really growing.  He uses some two-word phrases on his own and will repeat some three-word phrases.  We can get him to say "I love you" one word at a time.  And lately when we tell him to say "I" he immediately says "love" because he knows that comes next.  He gives out kisses like candy on Halloween.  He will say "kiss" and then either pull you down to his level or climb up on the couch to kiss you.  Its really cute.  He can say "truck" now instead of just "t-ck" so even the words he used to have trouble pronouncing he is starting to get right.  I can't believe he's going to be 2 in November.  Its coming up so fast.  Lately it seems that each month is gone before it even began.  My life is flying by in the blink of an eye, and I would give anything to slow it down.  I'm doing my best to live in the moment, every moment of every day.

As much as I don't want to admit it, Emmett is going to need a haircut soon.  It took him so long to get enough hair to need one, I thought this day would never come.  The hair around his ears is getting long, the back is getting long down his neck, and the front will be in his eyes soon.  We are going to try and wait until he turns two, but we'll see.  I just feel like once he gets that first haircut he won't be a baby anymore, he'll look like a little boy.  I'm just not ready for him to be a little boy.

(This post is being cut off here due to circumstances I will explain in a later post.) 

like old times

Emmett is teething again I think.  He was fussy yesterday during his nap and he seemed out of sorts all day.  Then last night he was fussy at bedtime, but went to sleep quickly.  However, he woke up crying 3 different times between 10:00 PM and 2:00 AM and wasn't able to calm down, so I had to go in and get him and rock him.  He was really restless even as I was rocking him and each time I layed him down he wasn't completely asleep.  But I guess rocking him calmed him down enough that he was able to get back to sleep on his own.  I gave him tylenol before bed last night, in case it was his teeth bothering him.  Then he cried hard enough that his nose got all snotty and stuffy and I thought maybe he was getting a cold.  But then this morning he slept in until about 8:30 and seemed to be fine.  He still hasn't eaten very well yesterday or today, and he has been a little lethargic compared to his usual self.  We're pretty sure its his teeth because it seems to bother him worse at bedtime.  Tonight he was fussy through his bath and getting ready for bed, but then went to sleep fast and peacefully.  So far so good, he has stayed asleep without crying.  So lets hope for a better night.  Last night felt like a blast from the past.  I've gotten so used to him sleeping through the night and it was literally a rude awakening to hear him crying through the monitor.  I easily fell into the same old routine, sit up, switch off the monitor, put my glasses on, and go to the bathroom because there's nothing worse than sitting down to rock him at night and realizing that I have to pee.  It made me miss nursing him, just a little bit.  Believe it or not I still have just a little bit of milk.  I wonder what he would do if I offered it to him after 4 months of not nursing, heh.  Well I just hope we have a better night tonight, for his sake more than mine.  I just feel so bad for him when I can tell he's not feeling well.  And especially when he's hurting enough that he cries.  I wish he could tell me what's bothering him so I would know for sure.  And I sure hope his appetite comes back.  My child always eats, so to see him refuse food is just odd.  Poor baby. 

Seasons

Yesterday it rained all day.  When I stepped out of my air conditioned office I was looking forward to feeling the usual blast of heat...and I didn't.  I got a cool breeze instead, and it really took me by surprise.  I know its September, and it is supposed to start cooling off, I just wasn't quite prepared for that.  I came home and put on my long yoga pants intead of the capri length ones and I considered putting on socks because my feet were freezing.  But I hate wearing socks, so I didn't. 

This morning it was still relatively cool so I decided to take Emmett to the park.  The first one we went to was still muddy due to yesterdays rain because it really needs to be re-mulched.  So we drove on to a different one.  As usual, Emmett only played on the actual playground equipment for a few minutes before he got bored and started running.  There is a walking path around the park that he loves, so we took that, alternating between walking and running down the paved path.  We veered off the path a few times to explore different things he saw along the way.  He is a really curious kid, who isn't interested in things he's supposed to play with.  When it comes to toys, he plays with them, but he would much rather have a grown up item to play with.  He loves his toy cars and trucks, they are by far his favorite.  But he is way more excited by real cars and trucks that we see outside.  Sometimes I find myself wishing that he would want to swing or slide at the park, but then I think that I'm glad he's curious and wants to learn about things.  I'm glad he doesn't just accept what he's given, that he pushes for more, wants to go beyond the obvious and think outside the box.  I think this child is destined to do great things.

His vocabulary is growing every day, and he is starting to perfect the pronounciation of some of his words.  Yesterday evening when we were out for a walk, he saw a dog and said "doggy" with the "g" sound in the middle, as opposed to "doddy" as he used to say.  It used to sound the same as when he said "Daddy".  Chris and I just looked at each other when he said it, and we both said, "Did he just say 'doggy'?"  Then this morning at breakfast he pronounced "waffle" properly.  He used to say both "water" and "waffle" as "wadoo."  But today he said it clear as a bell.  I'm glad he's starting to not only hear the distinction between certain letter sounds, but also be able to say them correctly. 

For Labor Day weekend we went to the beach for the last time this summer.  It was a good weekend.  We waited until about 4:00 on Saturday and Sunday to go out on the beach to avoid the brightest sun.  It was nice because I didn't even have to put sunscreen on myself, and even though I put it on Emmett, I didn't worry so much about missing a spot.  We ate well all weekend and drank a few beers, and I'm determined that after this weekend I am going to watch what I eat and exercise more.  I have gained a few more pounds back, and I'm not happy about it.  Emmett enjoyed the beach as usual, running up and down the beach and right into the waves with wild abandon.  I had to run full speed after him to catch him before he got in too deep because the waves would knock him off his feet in a second.  Between his great-grandparents, his grandparents, and us, it really did seem like it took all 6 adults to keep up with him.  Am I sure I want another child?  Yes, but I have to admit that the thought scares me slightly.  Right now I am loving life as it is, enjoying my baby boy while its just him and me during the day.  Things couldn't be better with him right now...I get a full night's sleep every night, I can lay in bed for a while in the morning just listening to him talking in his crib, I can throw him in the car at a moment's notice and head off wherever I need to go, I have 2 hours every afternoon while he's napping to do whatever I want.  If we have another baby, all of that goes bye bye.  I remind myself of this whenever I get in a hurry.

I'm excited about the approach of fall and all that comes with it: football, cool temperatures, pretty leaves, Halloween, apples and caramel, the Renaisance Festival, and later Thanksgiving and Emmett's birthday.  This season used to be the precursor to my winter depression, but I just don't feel that way about it anymore.  After having Emmett I am just a different person in a lot of ways, and I couldn't be happier.

To blog or not to blog?

I guess I choose to blog.

Not much going on today.  Thursday is usually laundry day.  I wash about 3 loads of clothes today, and tomorrow I do just one load with our sheets and towels.  We played outside for a little while this morning before it got too hot.  Emmett managed not to scrape his knees on the cement at all, surprisingly.  He gets a scraped knee about every other day it seems.  The kid just doesn't like to play in the grass.  He likes to run up and down the driveway and back and forth on the sidewalk in front of the house.  I'm about to buy him knee pads, if I can find any small enough for him.  He likes to push his little plastic lawn mower down the sidewalk.  We are thinking of getting him something that pedals, like a tricycle or something.  I'm not sure he's ready for it yet, but it may be worth a try.  Too bad by the time his birthday rolls around it will be cold.  We'll have to get it as a "just because" present.  I'm thinking of trying to find a used one at a consignment sale maybe.

I filled up his baby pool for this afternoon.  Its been out in the sun for a few hours now, so hopefully the water has had a chance to warm up.  Emmett doesn't like cold water.  When he gets up from his nap we'll check it out.  This might be one of our last chances to use the baby pool.  The evenings are already starting to get cooler.  I'm kind of excited a the prospect of fall this year.  I'm ready for cooler temperatures, and pretty leaves, and Halloween.  But fall is always just a little bittersweet for me because I know winter is coming, the only season I hate.  Luckily I live in a southern state where winter doesn't last very long.  If I had stayed in Erie, PA where I was born, I would probably have killed myself on a dark winter day under 4 feet of snow.  Of course I'm exagerating (about killing myself, not the snow, 4 feet of snow is normal up there) but I do know that Dad's job transfer to Virginia when I was 11 was a blessing in disguise.

So here's to the bittersweet end of summer...I will be celebrating with my feet in a baby pool and a Bud Light Lime in a VT coozy.   

Emmett's first baseball game

When the opportunity first presented itself, we really weren't sure we wanted to take him.  We have talked about taking him to see a Dash game (Winston-Salem's single A baseball team) but we haven't because Emmett is not a good sitter.  He prefers running around, wherever we are.  He is only willing to sit still while eating, and even then he's kicking his feet constantly.  He isn't the kind of kid who clings to our legs and wants to sit on our laps.  He is always moving and exploring.  So when Chris's company offered us a chance to see the Grasshoppers (Greensboro's single A baseball team) we game it some serious thought.  First of all, the tickets were free because of employee appreciation week.  We wouldn't want to pay for a game and have to leave early because Emmett wouldn't behave.  Second, the company has a box reserved at all the games, so not only would there be an air conditioned room for him to run around in, there would also be a section of seats out in front of the box that is basically fenced in so that he can be free to roam around without bothering strangers.  In light of that, we decided that the circumstances were actually perfect.

I got home from work Tuesday afternoon around 4:00 as I usually do.  I changed into casual clothes and packed a dinner for Emmett.  Then we headed to Greensboro to Chris's office around 5:00.  It takes a little less than 30 minutes to get there from our house, and luckily rush hour traffic is better going from Winston to Greensboro than the other way around.  We picked up Chris, grabbed a quick dinner, and headed to the stadium.  We were able to park relatively close, which is good considering we would have to carry Emmett, who is getting quite heavy and is usually not cooperative enough to hold our hands and walk with us.  We headed into the stadium and to the elevator that would take us up to the box.  The attendant operating the elevator asked us if this was Emmett's first ball game.  When we said yes, he gave him a baseball from his pocket as a souvenir.  Emmett smiled at him and said "ball."  We thanked him and headed up to the box.  Emmett explored the box room for a few minutes and quickly wanted to head outside to the seats.  This is the first picture we took on Chris's cell phone (we forgot our camera):

He loved looking through the railing down at the field and at the people below us.  He got to meet the team mascot:

He wasn't sure what to think of him at first, but then he shook his hand.  He wasn't afraid of him at all.  He did actually sit down on the steps for a little while as you can see in this next picture:

But I think his favorite "first" of the night was popcorn.  We had unlimited popcorn in our box and I let him try it for the first time (I never have before because I was worried about the kernels getting stuck in his throat or bothering his tummy - like they do me).  He ate about 2 cups full before I cut him off.  But he just kept his cup of popcorn in the cup holder and stood up against the railing watching the goings on.  The team has a black lab that retrieves the bats and he really enjoyed watching the "doggy" and saying "arf".

We ended up staying until the end of the 8th inning.  Emmett was in a great mood the whole time and we decided we'd stay until the end unless he started getting sleepy.  He sat on my lap for a while, which he almost never does, so I knew he was starting to get there.  Well in the bottom of the 8th we had a string of homeruns, after each there was a short burst of fireworks.  The first set just made him take a few steps backward.  The next set he looked a little concerned, and by the third set he started to cry.  I don't think fireworks would have made him cry under normal circumstances, but that was my signal that he was getting tired.  We decided to go because it was about 10:00 by that point I think, which is nearly an hour after his bedtime, knowing we still had at least a 30 minute drive home.  We stopped back at Chris's office so he could get his truck and we drove home.  I managed to keep him awake in the car, which is important for Emmett because we cannot pull him out of the car and lay him down still asleep.  He always wakes up and then takes forever to go to back to sleep.  We had him in bed by 11:00 and he slept in until 9:00 the next morning.  He was a little fussy when he woke up, and fussy at nap time, but otherwise he was fine the next day.  We were so glad he had a good time and we couldn't have asked for better behavior from him.  First baseball game was a wild success!

not such a big deal afterall

So I expected turning 30 to really hit me hard.  But it didn't.  It came, it went.  We went out the weekend after my birthday.  I had big plans to do some serious drinking and sing some karaoke.  Well I did drink quite a bit, but never got drunk.  Did sing some karaoke, but the dj at the bar we went to sucked.  He let his friends sing as much as they wanted and didn't call our group in order like its usually done, left out some of our friends all together.  So we ended up going back to our friends' house and playing Rock Band on their Wii and I had plenty of opportunities to sing then.  It was a good night, but I am definitely too old to drink like that.  I purposely held off on trying to get pregnant again just so that I could drink on my 30th.  Well I could have had just as good a time with no alcohol at all.  I'm one of those people who can get up and sing karaoke totally sober.  And when it was all said and done, I was not drunk at any point in the night, however I still woke up nauseous and had to throw up.  How stupid. 

I'm pretty happy with my life the way it is right now.  I haven't done any soul searching or worrying over whether or not I have achieved all I thought I would by this age.  I used to want 2 kids by the age of 30 and I only have one.  Oh well.  If I get pregnant soon I can still have the second one before I'm 31.  But who cares one way or the other?  I just want the second child to be born before Emmett turns 3.  I'm not teaching like I thought I would be.  If I had it to choose I wouldn't be working part time right now, but that's just something that I'm doing because I have to and I know its only temporary.  Lately I have been feeling more of an inclination to go back to teaching in some capacity, but not until Emmett and his future sibling are ready to go to school.  I wish I could have my own business or some kind of job that I could do part time from home so that I could be a stay at home mom but still make a little extra so that money wouldn't be quite so tight.  I really just want the freedom to be my own boss.  But selling stuff just isn't for me.  Oh well, my life is what it is and I love it.  I always wanted to be a mom someday, ever since I was little and played with my first doll.  Its my true calling in life, as if I was incomplete before.  Its like the thing I was always searching for that kept me from being completely happy.  I think as long as you are happy with your life, turning 30 isn't that hard.

30

So my birthday was yesterday.  I'm 30 now.  I thought I was going to have a lot to say about that.  But I don't.  Maybe some thoughts will come to me later.

A cold day in July

The weather is just beautiful here today.  Not even into the 80's yet according to our window thermometer.  Emmett and I went to the park this morning.  Unfortunately the first two parks we tried had something going on preventing us from being able to play.  So when we finally reached the third park, we only had about 45 minutes to play, bummer.  But we made the most of it.  There was another mom there with an 8 year old girl and a 3 year old boy.  Emmett loved the other kids, especially the boy.  He definitely wanted to do whatever he was doing.  Which prompted him to get up the courage to go down the big slide.  And when I say "the big slide", I mean this slide is taller than I can reach.  When he started up the steps I got a bit nervous because the steps are too steep for him to go up alone.  Also, he's not very good at stopping and catching himself with his feet at the bottom of the slide.  And I couldn't be at the top and the bottom at the same time.  Finally I got him to sit down at the top and I said, "Wait."  He sat there and waited very nicely.  I climbed down and stood beside the slide to catch him about halfway and slow him down so he wouldn't slide off the end.  But then he just sat up there and wouldn't slide down.  I told him to push off and slide down and it was like he couldn't figure out how to get started.  Finally he pushed off and slid down.  His shoes actually slowed him down a lot and he probably would have been fine without any help.  I was really proud of him for getting up the courage to do that.  He went down the big slide a few more times today.  The hardest part for me was the few seconds that I had to leave him sitting up there at the top while I ran down to the bottom.  Once he tried to stand back up at the top and I just about freaked because he could fall so easily.  I told him to sit back down and he did.  He doesn't always listen because he's 19 months old.  But he seems to know when the situation is serious and he usually does what I tell him in those situations.  Maybe its something in my voice, in my face, I don't know.  I want to get some pictures of him at the playground sometime, but I find it hard to take pictures when I'm trying to keep up with him.  I guess we'll have to do it on the weekend sometime when Chris is there.  I don't have nearly enough pictures of us out doing things for that very reason.  I'm tired of all my pictures of Emmett being in our living room.

My driver's license expires on Tuesday.  Happy Birthday to me, get to go to the DMV.  I'm planning to go Monday after work.  Let's hope it doesn't take 2 hours.  I just don't want to have to drag poor Emmett along.  I'm sure that would be a peach.  Would it kill them to have any weekend hours?

Sunday is our anniversary.  To this day I don't care for the date.  No matter how hard we try, our anniversary and my birthday seem to become one event.  But in the summer of 2004, that was literally the only day we could get married.  But tomorrow night Chris's parents are going to watch him for us so that we can go out.  We were going to see a movie, but there's actually nothing playing we both want to see.  We will at least go to dinner at Johnny Carinos.

Forcing myself to blog

Its been forever since I last posted.  I know.  I won't make any excuses about how I've been busy.  That's not really true.  What I will say is that lately, when I have these few moments when Emmett is sleeping, this just isn't how I feel like spending that time.  But he's napping now, been asleep almost 2 hours, so I'm going to use this time.

In my last post I mentioned that Emmett's favorite word is truck.  Well since then it has blown up into an obsession with vehicles of all kinds.  My boys boy loves cars, trucks, and trains, both the toys and the real things.  His favorite toys are his Chuck Trucks.  He has a big one and a bunch of the little ones.  He runs them along the floor, along the couch, along the furniture, etc.  He lines them up to make trains.  He has a wooden train with blocks that can be rearranged and he loves that too.  We need to see about getting him some more trains.  I shudder at the thought of starting the Thomas The Tank Engine collection.  He plays with them at Barnes and Noble and loves them, but I just don't want to get to the point where we have to have every single train piece.  I do want to find him some kind of track to run his cars through.  We are probably going to get him a summer present since his birthday doesn't come around until November.  Poor kid has his birthday and Christmas within a month of each other.  And there really aren't any good holidays between now and Christmas.  So we've been shopping around for just the right summer gift.  Plus with the heat lately we are stuck inside a lot and he gets bored.  We try to get out of the house and do things in air-conditioned places as much as possible.  Which brings me to this morning's excursion.

I just started going back to the library because I ran out of new books of my own that I needed to read.  I finished the last one I got just this morning so I wanted to get a new one.  When I looked up the hours for the library I found that they were having kids story time this morning.  So I decided to see how Emmett would do.  When we got there they had music playing and the kids were dancing.  Emmett immediately joined in and had a ball.  So then it was time to start the story.  When the rest of the kids sat down, Emmett was still standing so I sat down on the floor and he came over and sat down on my lap.  The lady passed out bags with colored squares cut out of foam board.  She started by reading Brown Bear, Brown Bear and the kids were supposed to hold up the right color square for the color of the animal on each page.  Well playing with the little squares entertained him for a few minutes, and then he was done sitting.  He started walking around all the other kids and then he walked right up to the book the lady was holding up and reading from and got right in the way.  I had to go get him and try to get him to sit down with me again.  He was starting to get frustrated when she finished the book and turned the music back on.  She passed out maracas to all the kids.  Emmett danced and shook his maracas and had a good time.  But then he wanted to run around and get into things he shouldn't, like the CD player.  He tried to take a maraca away from a little girl.  I called his name and said, "No no," and surprisingly he left her alone.  A rare moment where he listened.  After the song the lady started reading another book.  He then tried to get into something else he shouldn't, and when I told him no he didn't listen and I had to physically pull him away.  Well he lost it and I had to carry him out screaming.  We got in the car and went home and I didn't get a new book to read.  I felt so bad taking him out because he was really having such a good time.  But I couldn't let him misbehave like he was doing and I wasn't going to let him ruin story time for everyone else while he screamed.  Another lady had a little girl about Emmett's age and she said that she just pulls her out during the story and takes her back in for the songs because that's really all she can handle.  I don't know if we'll try again next week or not.  He did almost fall asleep in the car on the way home.  I think he was awake a little earlier than usual this morning and even though he has given up his morning nap, he still gets just a little sleepy an cranky around 11:00 some days.  Story time started at 10:30 and when we got back in the car it was only 10:55.  So I am on the fence about whether or not we will try again next week.  To be honest, I was a little embarassed today.  I don't want my child to be "that kid" who acts up and ruins story time.  But I do want him to have a chance to be around other kids.  Otherwise how will he learn?  He gets to be around other kids his age on Sundays when we go to church.  But that's only once a week, and we don't even go every Sunday.  So I'm always looking for opportunities for social interaction with other kids his age.  We'll see when next Wednesday rolls around.

Next Tuesday is coming.  Less than a week now.  Most of the time I almost forget.  But if I think about it too much and open that door, I get a little freaked out.  Sucks that its on a Tuesday and I have to be at work.  But I have no way to justify taking the day off.  We're not going out to celebrate until the 23rd anyway.  I'm going to need a few stiff drinks.  At least.

word of the week

Emmett's word of the week is "t-ck."  What's he saying?  I'll give you a hint: it has wheels and is often used to haul things.  That's right, truck.  He is becoming obsessed with vehicles of all kinds.  What a typical boy, right?  He knows the word "car" too, but has trouble distinguishing between cars and trucks sometimes.  Anything with wheels right now is a "t-ck", including the trains at Barnes and Noble today.  Whenever a vehicle goes by the house, he stops everything and runs to the window and says, "t-ck" and I say, "yes, truck" hoping that he will eventually get the middle of the word too.  But I'm actually excited that he at least has both the beginning and ending sound of the word, because he leaves the ends off of most words right now.  I just wanted to share this, because I think its cute.  This is the first time he's shown a major interest in anything.

and the student becomes the teacher

In my last post I was wondering whether or not I am teaching Emmett enough.  Well it seems every time I question something, he shows me the answer.  The other day I was actively trying to work on body parts with him, like the parts of the face and other body parts.  Sometimes he will point to them when I ask, and other times he looks at me like I'm speaking Chinese.  Well the other night he was in the tub and without me even asking, he pointed to his nose and said "No."  (He doesn't get the ending on most words.)  "Good job!" I told him.  And then he pointed to his ear and said "Eh" which is the closest he can get to "ear" at this point.  I asked him where his mouth is and he touched his mouth and said "Mo."  I asked him to show me his eye and he just about poked himself in the eye.  We have to be careful with that one.  He knows where his belly is but he can't say it, and he knows where his peepee is and can say that one too.  And he knows and can say toe.  Then just a couple of days ago he pointed to his knee and said knee and I haven't even tried to teach him that.  It just goes to show that you can't force these things, they learn from watching the world around them.

Today the weather was pleasantly cool for June but still sunny.  So I postponed laundry to tomorrow and we headed to the park.  We stayed for nearly two hours and had a great time.  Emmett is getting really good at climbing the ladder to the one slide and he climbs the stairs up to the other slides too holding onto the handrails.  He even climbed the "rock wall" which is really just a plastic wall with little steps cut out, but its relatively steep.  Its been a few weeks since we have been to that playground and I was so impressed with how much more he could do this time.  We sat on the bench and he ate some raisins and drank some water from my nalgene bottle, only pouring it down himself once, which is pretty good considering its the wide mouth variety.  It was just nice to be outside without feeling like we're going to melt in the heat.  I hope this cool wave continues.

This is one of those days where I could eat an entire can of frosting with a spoon.  Good thing I don't have any.  Bummer.  Or a whole bag of marshmallows would do, but again, none in the pantry.  Maybe today is not a good day to go grocery shopping.  I'm afraid of what I might come home with.

This is how my thoughts flow

I don't really feel like posting, but I need to since its been too long.  So here goes the random flow of my thoughts.

Its getting harder and harder to get housework done lately.  Emmett is just all over the place and its getting so that I can't leave him alone in the living room for very long without him climbing on things he shouldn't.  And I don't want him right with me when I'm using cleaning products and things like that.  So, I just do a little bit every day and check on him a lot to make sure he's not scaling the walls.  Since I went back to work part time in January I have even less time for housework during the week.  At first it was kinda nice to be back at work, out among adults a few days a week.  But that has worn off now, and I really wish I could just be home with him.  I am especially starting to hate working on Saturday mornings.  By the time I get home from work its 12:30 and Emmett naps from 1:00 to 3:00, and then the day is almost over already before we even get to do anything as a family.  The weekends go by too fast and then its back to work, all week for Chris and just Monday and Tuesday for me.  Ho hum.

Most of the time I think I do a pretty good job of enjoying my time with Emmett and just loving being a mom.  But like a lot of moms sometimes I worry about things.  Recently I have begun to worry that maybe I don't spend enough time actively teaching my child.  Of course I provide him with educational toys and he watches a few educational kids TV shows each day.  And he brings me books and climbs into my lap and we read A LOT.  His vocabulary has literally exploded lately, to the point where Chris and I have started being more careful about what we say.  But I'm just not sure I am finding the right balance between structured learning time and free play.  I think free play is how most 18 month olds spend the majority of their day.  And part of the time I work with him on his shape sorter and he even uses it correctly on his own sometimes, but mostly he just plays with the blocks and the bucket.  And he has a farm animal puzzle that we work on sometimes, but mostly he just chews on the pieces.  And a lot of his books are about colors and I try to work on that with him, but I wouldn't say he really knows any of his colors.  He can say blue, but I'm not sure he recognizes the color.  But to bring it all back to my original point, I'm not sure how to know what the right balance is between structured learning and learning through play.  I have a Bachelor's degree in Early Childhood Education, which you would think would make me more likely to overdo the educational aspect of being mom.  But a lot of days I'm not sure I'm doing enough active teaching.  And since he doesn't go to daycare, he isn't getting any other structured education, its up to me, which is the way I want it.

On that note, I have considered possibly getting him involved in some kind of preschool or playgroup or something like that to get him around other kids his age.  Our church has some kind of program like that and I've been meaning to find out more about it.  I also belong to a mommies group that sometimes meets for playdates with our kids.  It just seems like they don't have events often enough and when they do, they often don't fit in our schedule.  Now that Emmett has given up his morning nap we have that morning time that we could use for preschool or playdates.  I think for now I am going to focus more on making playdates with other kids his age.  He's a little young for preschool and we can't afford to tak him anywhere like a daycare center that charges a fee.  Unless I went to work while he was there.  But then I'd barely break even.  And I'd much rather be with him.

Tomorrow afternoon we are taking him bowling for the first time.  My mommies group is going and kids can play free for the whole summer.  So we'll see how he does.  I'm mostly afraid he will just want to run all around the bowling alley and not stay anywhere near our lane.  My child knows no boundaries.  I will take pictures and fill you in later!

Memorial Day Weekend Beach Trip

This is the best picture of the three of us out on the beach in Oak Island, NC.  We are so spoiled because Chris's grandparents live at the beach and we can go anytime we want, its just a 4 hour drive.  We had a great time.  Emmett loved the beach this year.  Last year he was only 6 months and he mostly sat under the umbrella on a blanket.  He was just sitting up on his own then and I was too afraid to let him get sand all over him or get "dirty seawater" on him.  It took me about the first year to get over that kind of stuff.  This year he ran all over the beach and through the water.  He got covered in sand and had a blast.  At first he wasn't very good at walking through the waves, he kept losing his balance and falling down.  He was like a little drunk baby.  But on the second day he got better at it and by the third day on the beach he was a pro.  He ran through the waves without any hesitation.  He ran up and down the beach stopping to say hi to everyone we passed.  Here are some more pictures of him on the beach.

Yes, I am actually posting pictures of me in a bathing suit on the internet.  I am finally satisfied with my current weight, even though I am still Whitey McWhiterson.  Can't help that.  Nothing is more hideous than a redhead with a fake tan.  Emmett mastered the skill of drinking from a water bottle.  He refused to drink water from his sippy cup all weekend.  Chris and I drank plenty of Bud Light Lime.

Here he is drinking from his own water bottle.  He seemed to be less likely to drop it in the sand if we put a coozy on it.

Here he is sitting in the water watching his sand toys float all around him.

Building a sand castle with Pawpaw.

Running on the beach.  He was full speed the whole time.

Here is all three of our footprints.  Chris is on the left, Emmett is obviously in the middle, and mine is on the right.  I know, my footprint is the same size as Chris's.  He has small feet for a guy and I have big feet for a girl (only size 9, nothing crazy though).  Emmett's little footprints in the sand were just too cute so I wanted to take this picture with all of ours.

The weekend was over way too fast.  Not sure when we're going back, but I can't wait!

A rare rough night

For some reason Emmett woke up at 5:15 Tuesday morning.  I heard him crying through the monitor so I went in to see what was wrong because he almost never wakes up before 8:00.  I thought maybe he had lost his pacifier, which is usually the only reason he fusses anymore.  When I opened the door he was standing up in his crib holding his pacifier, so that wasn't it.  I got him out and considered changing his diaper, but decided not to because I didn't want to wake him up any further than he already was.  I sat down with him in the glider and rocked him for a while.  His eyes closed right away and he seemed to be asleep.  I held him for a while longer just to make sure and he seemed out.  But then when I tried to stand up he started crying again.  So I sat back down and we rocked a while longer.  Finally about 6:00 he was really out so I laid him down and went back to bed.  I was hoping to get maybe 2 more hours of sleep because I don't have to get up until 8:00 to get ready for work.  Well I managed to get back to sleep but woke again to the sound of Emmett crying at 6:23.  I went back in and this time I went ahead and changed his diaper.  I settled back in the glider with him again and we rocked until about 7:00 when Chris left for work.  I held him until I heard the garage door close and then attempted to put him down again.  Well this time after I laid him down he just stood up and whined.  So I carried him to my bed to see if he would maybe just lay down with me for a while.  Well that didn't work, and I wasn't surprised because bringing him into our bed has never worked for E.  So we got up.  I let him run around our bedroom while I got ready for work.  He was driving me crazy getting into everything.  Usually I leave him in his crib happily talking to himself while I get ready, but that wasn't an option that morning.  I finally managed to get make-up on, my hair done, and myself dressed in between saving various items from being thrown in the toilet and keeping the toilet paper on the roll.  We were done with breakfast before Nana even got there to watch him for the day.  It was a long morning.  When I got to work I got myself a Mt. Dew (no matter how hard I try, I still can't drink coffee) and that perked me up just enough to be nice to members on the phone.  Needless to say, my sales were not up to par that day.

But last night he fell asleep fast, a little after 9:00 and slept until 8:00 this morning.  Now that's a typical night for us.  Am I really ready to do the newborn thing all over again?  I must admit it scares me slightly.  Nights like that made me a little crazy.  And if there's two, what if they both wake up at night?  Oh my.  Yeah, I think I can wait a few more months to start trying again.

Living for today

Woke up this morning and the weather was beautiful.  So I decided Emmett and I would get around and go to the park.  We got dressed and sunscreened and we were out the door.  I'm so glad I found this closer playground than the others we had been frequenting.  It just doesn't make sense to drive 15 minutes across town just to play for an hour and a half or less.  Usually that's all the time we have in the morning by the time we get up, eat breakfast, and get around to leave the house. 

Emmett and I had a good time.  We climbed, we slid, we swang, we walked, we ran.  Emmett snacked on some raisins (which are probably his favorite food right now) and drank some water.  There was another family there, a couple with 2 year old twins, a boy and a girl.  They were so cute, but just watching them made me appreciate having just one.  There are moments that I strongly consider stopping with one.  But I want to experience it all one more time.  And I loved having a brother (most of the time) when I was growing up and I love having a brother now.  Of course if my parents had decided to stop with one, I wouldn't exist to know what life would have been like as an only child. 

But that family at the park today really put things into perspective for me.  Lately I had been getting caught up with worrying about how we will ever be able to afford to have another baby.  I worry so much about the future sometimes that I forget to be happy with what I have now.  These days that Emmett and I spend together just the two of us are precious because it won't always be like this.  And these days as a little family of three are precious too.  I love eating dinner together at the kitchen table every night and I enjoy the rare occasions that we go out to eat.  I love sitting on the couch with Emmett in between us reading books or watching Wheel of Fortune.  I love giving him a bath together and reading him a bedtime story.  Last night I was wondering out loud with Chris about what we used to do with our time before we had Emmett.  Its like I can't even remember what life was like without him.  But I do know one thing, life is much much better with him!

A good helper

Emmett has finally reached the age where he can sometimes actually help with chores.  His favorite seems to be laundry.  He will push the laundry basket from the bedroom down the hall to the laundry room and throw some of the clothes into the washer.  Sometimes he does this even when its not laundry day, but that's ok.  He will help move clothes from the washer to the dryer as well.  But most of the time he runs around upstairs between the bedrooms wreaking havoc.  But he loves laundry day for that exact reason, because he gets to run around upstairs.

The other day when we got back from our evening family walk we noticed that the tree in our front yard really needed some pruning.  Its an ugly tree anyway.  We didn't plant it, the contractor who built our house did, and we're considering ripping it out, but the pruning improved it slightly.  I was carrying the branches that Chris cut off and throwing them into the back of his truck.  Emmett was running around the front yard while this was going on and suddenly decided to pick up some branches himself.  He walked over the truck with them and I lifted him up so he could throw them in the back of the truck.  He was very pleased with himself, and it was so cute.   

Lastly, he has started helping somewhat with putting toys away before naptime.  After lunch I let him play for a little while to let his food settle before nap (to be honest, its so he can poop before nap because he usually does, haha).  He helped me put the mega blocks back in the bag and also helped put some of his toys in his toy box.  And a couple of smaller things, he wipes his own face if I hand him the washcloth and he wipes his own nose if you hand him a tissue.  He doesn't do a very good job mind you, and he moves his head back and forth instead of the tissue or washcloth, but the effort is what counts.  And lately during diaper changes I will let him play with a wipe so that he will lay still, and he will try and wipe himself (a good start for potty training!)  So if we can continue on this road I think he will be a good helper by the time we are ready for another baby.  Yay!

Long time, no post = long post

Easter was good this year.  We spent the weekend at Chris's parents' house.  I missed Emmett finding his Easter basket because I was in the bathroom.  Boy did that make me mad.  But I was told he saw his Sponge Bob first and ran over and picked it up and said, "Bob Bob" as he calls him.  That was definitely his favorite Easter present.  We attempted an Easter Egg hunt but Emmet wasn't interested.  He ignored the eggs we put in the grass and picked up rocks out of the flower bed around the pool.  That boy loves rocks.  He spends the majority of his outside time hunting rocks.  He even picks them out of the dirt with fingers.  Maybe we have a future geologist on our hands.

The Tuesday after Easter we headed to my parents' house in VA.  We spent Tuesday night there and then got up Wednesday morning and headed to PA to my grandparent's house (my mom's parents).  The drive was 4 hours and Emmett did really well.  He only slept about 40 minutes of the trip but he was very good and barely fussed at all.  It helped that we rode with my parents so my mom and I were in the back seat with him to help entertain him.  He loved my grandparents' house which is out in the woods.  He wanted to go trapesing out into the woods but he we had to reign him back in, mostly to keep him out of poison ivy.  He loves being outside.  Fortunately the weather was nice that afternoon.  Emmett didn't really sleep all that well that night.  The first time I put him down he slept about 40 minutes and woke up crying.  I had to rock him back to sleep but he stayed down after that until waking up at 5:30 the next morning.  I don't know why he was up so early.  But we were all sleeping in one big open space in the basement and I know at least 3 out of 4 of the adults snore.  So when he woke up and realized he was not alone in the room, he decided to get up and see what was going on.  Then he decided to poop, so we had to change his diaper.  I attempted to rock him back to sleep and I thought I had him out around 7:00 (and by that time, what's the point, right?) but when I tried to lay him down he woke up.  So that was a long day. 

When we got up it was raining so we were cooped up in the house all morning until it was time to head out to my Aunt's house to visit my dad's side of the family, about 3 hours away.  Most of dad's side of the family live in the same town within just a few miles of each other.  We stayed at my Aunt Pat's house because she has the most rooms and beds.  There was a time when we all would have stayed at my grandparents' house.  But Grandpa died the summer of 2000 and after that my Grandma moved into her own double-wide modular home that would have been too small for all of us anyway.  But now Grandma is in an assisted living home because of the health issues she has had as a result of brain cancer.  She had brain tumors removed a few years ago and she was cancer free, however she wasn't able to make it through chemo.  They told her that if she wasn't able to complete chemo that there was a good chance the cancer would come back.  She said she wouldn't go through any more chemo, if the cancer came back it was just her time and she was ready.  Well the tumors are growing back.  So the main purpose of the trip was to take Emmett to meet his Great Grandma while she is still here.  He did really well considering.  He didn't like being cooped up in her little room in the home.  And he wouldn't sit on her lap because he doesn't like to sit on anyone's lap, he wants to be moving all the time.  Unfortunately we weren't able to get any good pictures of them together.  We visited her twice over the few days we were up there and she seemed to enjoy it, even though she isn't always very aware of things anymore.  I had to deal with the fact that it may be the last time I will see her and possibly the only time Emmett will ever see her.  I'm not sure I have really dealt with those feelings yet.

Emmett did get to meet his other cousins, my cousins' kids.  There were so many kids running around my Aunt LuAnn's house, I almost went crazy.  Here's the aproximate age dynamic: Reagan 5 or 6, Landon 4, Saydee 3, Carmondy 2 or 3, and Allyson 11 months.  He loved seeing baby Ally because he finally wasn't the youngest.  He kept pointing to her and saying "beebee".  And its amazing how tiring it is to chase him around other people's houses that aren't baby proof like ours is.  He and I were both ready for bed every night and he slept really well at my Aunt's house.

We headed home on Saturday and decided just to drive the whole 7 hours back to my parents' house rather than stopping again at my grandparents' house due to the bad night he had there.  I wasn't sure how he would handle being in the car that long, but he surprised me again by being really good.  He slept pretty well, I think two different times for maybe an hour or more each time, so that helped.  That was officially our longest car trip with him and we were pleasantly surprised.  Our trip to the beach Memorial Day weekend, only 4.5 hours, should be a peach. 

So, Emmett has learned some new words recently.  I mentioned before that he says baby, which sounds more like "beebee" but he knows what it means.  He says it whenever we are out and he sees a baby.  If I tell him to go get his baby he will find his doll and bring it to me.  If he even hears me or Chris say the word baby he will go get his baby and bring it to us.  He gives the baby kisses too, its so cute.  He still says cheese, but its still missing the s on the end, so its just "chee".  When I ask him to say please, and I have to say it twice, please please, he will say "peepee".  He says Dada on command but usually won't say Mama.  And he knows shoe.  That one he says exactly right.  I think that one is sheer motivation, because getting his shoes on means we're going outside.  He's branching out some with food.  He likes macaroni and cheese.  He loves tater tots.  And he will eat chicken nuggets now, which makes it so much easier to feed him when we're out.  We ate at Chick-fil-A the other night and it just happened to be kids eat free night so he got a 4 piece nuggets and ate almost all of them.  He ate his entire fruit cup that came with it and drank half his little milk jug.  We continue to offer him most of whatever we're eating (within reason, nothing too spicy or fatty or sugary...wish I could hold myself to the same standards) and sometimes he will eat it and sometimes he won't.  He doesn't care for anything with tomato sauce so far, which is the majority of what I eat.  But I have heard a lot of kids are that way at first and they start to like tomato later on, its such a strong flavor.  He's a really good eater though, I'm fortunate not to have to worry about that. 

I could talk about Emmett all day, but I will end this for now because its long enough.  I will try to be better about posting, its just difficult that I can't even touch the computer when E is awake because he just wants to pound the keys.  Love him to pieces though :)

Easter Weekend

When I was a kid, Easter was one of my favorite holidays.  I loved finding my Easter basket, the candy, Easter egg hunts, coloring eggs, even getting dressed up for church.  I wasn't much of a fan of wearing dresses when I was a kid, but I loved shopping for my Easter dress every year. 

Its a little different now that I'm the parent instead of the kid.  But its just as fun getting Emmett's Easter basket ready.  This is his second Easter, but last year he was only 4 months old and couldn't really appreciate it.  This year he will be excited to see his basket and his toys.  I'm still not giving him any candy this year.  But I got him a really cute stuffed duck, a book, and a few other small toys.

Last year in his Easter basket Emmett got a book called "What is Easter?"  It talks about all the fun stuff I mentioned earlier like coloring eggs and getting dressed up and eating candy.  But then it explains the real reason that we celebrate Easter.  Every time I read it to him I get a little choaked up when I get to the part at the end that says "He wants to live inside you too and fill you up with love."  I hope that as he gets older he will understand what the book really means.

And of course I have already eaten entirely too many Reese's Peanut Butter Eggs.  They are my biggest weakness.  I've had a few Cadbury Creme Eggs too.  Those are the two kinds of Easter candy I can't do without.

He just makes it too easy...

Sometimes I forget just how good I have it.  Emmett is a really easy kid for the most part.  He sleeps great at night and takes good naps.  He eats well but doesn't overeat.  And he likes healthy foods too.  He drinks milk and water from his sippy cup like a champ (he's never even tasted juice and I plan to keep it that way).  And he's usually a happy kid.  He doesn't whine unless he has good reason.  He doesn't cry unless he gets hurt, or occasionally when he doesn't get his way when its something he feels really strongly about.  I know part of his good nature is just his personality.  But I also feel that Chris and I have to take some of the credit too.  He has a predictable schedule each day: meals, nap, and bedtime are always at relatively the same time.  Of course we do different things during the day in between those times so every day isn't exactly the same, otherwise we would all be terribly bored.  But kids like to know what to expect, it helps them to be well-adjusted.  Of course Chris and I have had to adjust our lives around Emmett, and we have this parenting thing down pretty well right now.  Just wait until we throw a second child into the mix.  I'm like 2% nervous and 98% excited about what that will be like.  Its starting to become harder and harder to wait, but I know its the right thing to do.  We need just a little more time to be financially and emotionally prepared.

On the other hand, during those times when Emmett makes this parenting thing a little difficult, I'm at a loss.  He's getting to the age where discipline is becoming necessary at times and I just don't know how I want to handle it.  I've tried a few things and so far the only thing that seems to work is redirection.  When he is getting into something he shouldn't, I can almost always get him interested in something constructive instead.  And I find that when he is getting into something he shouldn't be, its usually because he's bored and he needs a change of scenery or a new activity.  Redirection is something I learned in my child development classes in college and it works for children of all ages, most of the time.  But there will come a time in certain situations where actual disciplinary action will be necessary, and I'm just not sure what my method is going to be yet.  As a child I was spanked, but only a handful of times that I can even remember.  I was sensitive, so a simple scolding was usually enough to bring me to tears.  I've swatted Emmett on the butt a few times through his clothes, and it doesn't do much good.  Often I don't do it hard enough and he just laughs, or if I get him hard enough that he cries, it still doesn't stop the behavior.  He goes right back to whatever he was doing.  And he thinks its a game.  He runs right over to what he's not supposed to be doing and looks back at me to see if I'm watching with a big ol' grin on his face.  I've also slapped the back of his hand a few times when he's throwing food off his tray or ripping his bib off when he still needs to have it on.  Again, same thing, he either laughs or cries and then goes right back to what he was doing.  And I don't like the way I feel after doing it.  It just seems wrong.  So I think I've decided that physical punishment does not work for me or for Emmett.  A lot of parents have success with "time out" but Emmett is too young for that.  He would never sit in a chair for a minute.  So I don't know.  I never expected to have trouble with this.  When you're an expert in child development, you expect it to be easy, black and white.  But when its your own child its just not that simple.  For now as long as redirection continues to work, that's the plan I'm going with until it doesn't.

Sometimes I still wake up fightin' mad

I've been sort of crabby yesterday and today.  I'm not really sure why.  Yesterday I would have chalked it up to the gloomy weather, but today its sunny and warm, so I don't know.  Hopefully I will get over whatever it is soon.

We stopped watching The Office after last season because the show was really starting to go downhill.  I would watch entire episodes without even cracking a smile, let alone actually laughing out loud.  So we canceled the recording on the dvr.  However, now that Will Ferrell is going to be on the show, I may just have to start watching again.  I will at least give it a try for an episode or two.

I think I've decided to wait until after my second annual 29th birthday in July to start trying for baby number two.  It would be nice to have a couple of drinks to celebrate my birthday and also to be able to enjoy some beers by the pool and at the beach over the summer.  Emmett is almost done nursing, we are down to bedtime only and even then he seems to be less interested.  So it will be nice to have a few months where I don't have to worry about what I'm eating or drinking.

The week after Easter we are driving with my parents to Pennsylvania to see my extended family.  We will only be in the car for about 4 hours at a time, so it shouldn't be too bad.  Emmett has been on a few trips that long in the past (to the beach) but the last time was when he was only 9 months in his rear-facing carseat and he slept most of the way.  So who knows how he will do this time.  It will be a crowded car with 4 adults and a 16 month old.  Any tips for traveling would be appreciated.

I wish my next True Blood dvd would get here, I have nothing to watch.

Cold vs. Allergies

I really don't feel like blogging lately.  So I'm forcing this one because its been too long already.

We think Emmett has allergies.  He's had a runny nose all week and I thought he was coming down with another cold, except that he doesn't act like he feels bad at all and he doesn't really have any other cold-like symptoms.  He was sneezing a  little bit, but not lately.  He coughs a little when he wakes up the last few days, but not too bad.  So I'm still not sure.  It could have just been a weak cold that has almost run its course.  I guess we'll see.  It doesn't seem to get any worse outside, and we've been outside a lot this week because the weather has been nice.  So who knows.

I took Emmett to a playground that I found that's closer to the house than some of the other ones we usually go to.  Its a bit smaller, and it has mulch, which I'm not a fan of.  But its on this side of one of the main roads in Winston that allows us to avoid a lot more traffic.  (Unfortunately we don't have a decent playground in our neighborhood)  He had a good time climbing around and swinging.  The more we're around other kids the more I realize that Emmett is really tall for his age.  Either that or its just a fluke that we keep seeing kids who are a bit older than him who are smaller.  When you look at him you would think he's older because he's bigger, but then when you see how much more advanced the other kid is, it becomes more obvious.  Emmett is 16 months and we saw a kid at Stride Rite who was 19 months and significantly smaller.  But the kid was talking much better and was a few months ahead of him in the motor skills department.  We saw a little girl who was 18 months at the park last weekend who was shorter than him but could obviously climb up the playground stairs much better and was using quite a few intelligible words. 

Speaking of words, Emmett seems to have mastered "Bye."  He says it to me when I'm getting ready to leave for work, he says it whenever someone leaves, and he says it when he hears me say it on the phone.  He says "cheese" pretty well too at dinner time when he's ready for it (its his favorite part of the meal).  So we're getting there.  By 18 months he should really be using more words than he is now, so we're working on it.  The hard part for Emmett is that he won't say them on command, so its hard to get him to say them for the doctor.  Oh well, I don't care what the doctor thinks.  I have a degree in Child Development, I know what he's supposed to be doing and when. 

I do know his fine motor skills are right on par.  He's getting pretty good with his fork and spoon.  I think he's about ready for some of those egg-shaped crayons even though they say 18 months.  He even uses the regular crayons we get at restaurants sometimes before he decides he wants to eat them.  I have noticed a decrease in his tendency to put everything in his mouth.  That makes me happy.  The world of things he can play with opens up significantly when he stops that.

So even though I didn't feel like it, when I start typing it just flows. 

This weather is killing me

It has been so cold and gloomy lately, its depressing.  I can't wait for some actual spring-like weather.  Emmett wants to go outside so bad.  He keeps grabbing my hand and leading me over to the door.  But I just can't bring myself to take him out in the cold.  He just got over a series of colds that ended in a nasty cough.  He hasn't been coughing at all the last few days and I'm afraid the cold air will get him started again.  Its supposed to be in the 60s this weekend, so we'll probably go to the park at some point.

So now that my metabolism has slowed down since I'm barely breastfeeding anymore, I've gained a couple of pounds back.  And I know I said that I missed being a litte more curvy, but even so, I find myself getting antsy about gaining weight back.  I really don't want to be at the weight I was before I got pregnant with Emmett.  And I am close to being ready to start trying for baby number two, and its really important to me that I start this pregnancy at a more healthy weight and I plan to work really hard at not gaining as much weight next time.  So I'm really trying to watch what I eat, especially trying to give up the little snacks that I was used to eating during the day that I really no longer need. 

And as the weather gets better it will be easier to get out and take walks, which was one of the things that helped me lose the weight in the first place.  Emmett still likes riding in his stroller just as long as I let him get out and play outside when we get back to the house.  When he was a baby our daily walks were the only thing that kept me sane sometimes.  We walked many laps around our little neighborhood.  I even bundled him up when it was cold and we would take short walks, so long as the temperature was in the 40s or higher.  I miss being able to carry him in the snuggli front carrier.  He's so big now I'm sure I wouldn't even want to carry him on my back in one of those backpack carriers.  I miss the baby days sometimes, but I don't miss the sleepless nights.  I have to focus on the bad parts of the first year so that I don't miss it too much.  I love this stage too, but every stage has its good and bad parts.  Right now I love watching him learn and discover things.  But its frustrating how every time I sit down on the couch he grabs my hand and wants to pull me somewhere, almost always to the front door.  Its a good thing he sleeps through the night at this age, otherwise I wouldn't have the energy to keep up with him.

I got my baby back baby back baby back!

Emmett seems to be back to his usual sweet self.  Yesterday he was great, only fussing during the typical fussy times of the day (nap time, diaper changes, coming in from playing outside, bedtime.)  But even during those times the fits he threw were minimal in comparison to the previous few days.  Today has been even better.  I think its a combination of having two really good nights of sleep and just feeling better in general.  He's still coughing some, but not nearly as much as he was.  I am relieved to find that it was due to the fact that he was sleepy and not feeling well, not that he was just entering a difficult phase.

He's really enjoying his ability to climb up on the couch or the chair and ottoman whenever he wants.  Sometimes he has still has a little trouble getting up and he just screams in frustration.  It makes me laugh because he gets so mad when he can't do something he wants to do.  I can't help it, its just such a huge overreaction that its comical.  But he's getting to the point where I can trust him again to leave him in the living room.  He can climb down safely and I don't have to worry about him falling.  I was able to get a bunch of cleaning done today while he watched Sesame Street.  Chris's grandparents are coming this weekend so I needed to get things ready for them.  They are staying through Tuesday so they can watch Emmett while I'm at work since Chris's mom and dad are going to be out of town.  I'm sure Emmett is going to love having them here.

Lately Emmett doesn't like it when I cut his food into bite-size pieces.  He wants the whole banana so he can take bites off of it just like big people do.  Problem is he takes bites that are too big and I have to worry about him choking.  Sometimes I have to stick a finger in his mouth and pull half the bite back out because he starts gagging on it.  And sometimes I get bit in the process.  We're working on using utensils, but I don't always have the patience necessary for that.  I know I have to let him make a mess sometimes in order for him to learn, but I don't like it.  And often times he plays with the utensils more than he eats with them.  He does really well eating yogurt with a spoon because it sticks well and doesn't drip much.  But sometimes he gets excited and starts waving the spoon and the yogurt goes everywhere.  That's when spoon time is over for that particular meal.  He's working on learning to stab bites with his fork and put them in his mouth, but that's pretty slow going for now.  Its going to take a bit more practice.  But he is well on his way to independent eating.

Well I think he may be waking up from him nap, finally.  He has taken really long naps the last few days, but I still think he's catching up from losing sleep while he wasn't feeling well.  Now to figure out what we're going to do to get out of the house this afternoon.

Who is this child?

Because I'm not sure I know him anymore.  For the last few days he has been in a rotten mood.  In his defense he has had a cold for the better part of the month of March.  Its about done, but he has this cough that keeps hanging on.  It mostly bothers him at night when he's laying down.  I can't elevate one end of his crib, because he rolls around so much he would just end up facing the wrong way and it would be counterproductive.  We were giving him tylenol at bedtime to help him sleep, but it didn't seem to make much difference.  So I got some ibuprofen to try instead.  That seemed to really do the trick.  I don't know if it just calmed the inflamation in his chest (since ibuprofen is an anti-inflamatory and tylenol isn't) or if it was somehow stronger and made him sleepier.  We gave him the ibuprofen two nights in a row and although he slept like a rock both nights, his days were just awful.  He still seemed so tired, he was reluctant to get up in the morning, and he was just really fussy all day.  Of course I had to go to work while he was like that, which made it that much harder to leave him believe it or not.  Even though he wasn't fun to be around, I just felt bad not being there for him when he was feeling bad.  Chris and I discussed it at length and decided that maybe the ibuprofen, while knocking him out cold at night, was not allowing him to get a good restful sleep.  Not that he was getting that before, when he was coughing up a lung every night.  His cough did seem a bit better yesterday so we decided to try putting him to bed with no meds last night.  He was a nightmare through the process of getting ready for bed, but then he nursed like a champ and went right to sleep.  Much to my surprise, he slept through the night.  Never heard a peep out of him, just occassional rustling as he moved to get comfortable.  He slept all the way until 8:00.  He woke up in a great mood this morning and wasn't fussy at all until after lunch when it was time for nap.  So we're hoping that things are going to be better from here on out. 

I was really beginning to worry that it had nothing to do with him being sick or tired, and that it was a phase he was entering where he was going to throw a fit every 5 minutes when he didn't get his way.  He is getting frighteningly independent lately.  He is absolutely fearless, and it scares me to death.  His newest accomplishment is that he can now climb up on the couch.  That eliminates the one little sacred island where I could put things he couldn't get to, an end table sandwiched between the couch and the chair and ottoman.  So much for that!  Now we have to pile everything up on the counter that separates the living room from the kitchen.  I have to get up to go to the remote to change the channel.  I have to get up to go get my phone whenever Chris and I email back and forth during the day.  I can't even use the laptop when he's awake.  We are probably going to have to rearrange the furniture as well.  And the worst part is that I can't leave him alone in the living room anymore because I don't trust him to be on the couch by himself without trying to dive off the back onto his head or climb on the end table. 

I am really not looking forward to entering the stage of parenting where discipline is necessary, and we are right on the cusp of it.  But the rewards outweigh the costs.  Although it is a pain for me that he can climb up on the couch, I was so proud of him the first time I saw him do it.  After watching him throw his leg up time and time again just to slide back down on the floor and scream in frustration, it was a beautiful moment when he succeeded.  The proud look on his face mirrored my own.

Posting from work...

During my 15 minute lunch break.  Work is sucking out  my will to live.  That's all I can say without going into detail, which I don't have time for. 

Finding parenting to be extremely challenging lately.  There have been ups and downs along the way, and we are definitely in a down swing and have been for a few weeks.  I think he is trying to show me that I am not ready for another child.  He is certainly showing me that is not ready to be a big brother.

That's all for now.  Back to work!

Winning!

I know, its being used so much its starting to get cliche.  I don't know how to make an e with one of those little symbols over it like cliche should have.  So I will just have to hope everyone can figure it out :)

Well Emmett is already over his cold.  We only lost one night of sleep.  Sunday night he was up almost every hour and I was up with him.  No sooner would I get him rocked back to sleep and back in his crib and I would crawl back into my bed, and next thing you know, he'd be up again.  But Monday night he slept through the night, and he has been sleeping well the rest of the week.  His nose is almost cleared out, still a little snotty.  He did cough some with this cold, which is a first, but he seems to be over that too.  I just worry about coughing more because of all the lung issues he had when he was born.  I know that when we took him home from the hospital 15 months ago he had a clean bill of health and they said none of that would affect him in the long term.  But I am still just a little paranoid.  But really, he got over this cold faster than the last one, I couldn't have asked for any better unless he just never got a cold at all.

My parents are coming to visit this weekend.  I wish I had been able to ask off work tomorrow.  Oh well, its only 9:00 to noon.  But I'm excited!  I love having them here and Emmett loves seeing Grandma and Grandpa.  The weather is supposed to be pretty nice this weekend too, so that's good.  Hopefully we can spend some time outdoors.

Well I hear Emmett waking up from his nap.  That was almost 2 hours today, much better than yesterday when he woke up after just a little over an hour and was crabby afterwards.  He sound like he's in a good mood today.

I'm making shrimp a la creole for dinner tonight.  (Dang, another situation where I need an accent over a letter and I don't know to do it, this time the a.)  This recipe actually requires me to cut fresh vegetables, which is something I am usually never willing to do.  I am a lazy, reluctant cook.  I've actually never cut up a green pepper before.  I've seen it done, so I think I can handle it though.  And I also have cut an onion, and I'm thinking you have to peel off the outside layers or something like that.  Hmm...I better google that one.  Yeah...wish me luck!